The Life of a Girl

The Life of a Girl
It’s never been easy, the life of a girl. Talking about it gets the response: sit in your corner and be quiet.
That’s what’s wrong! So many of us stay quiet. Don’t rock the boat! Don’t be assertive! Don’t let the men
see you are smarter or more accomplished! The life of a girl runs best when we listen to everyone else’s
opinion of what to say, what to wear, what to do, and what to think!
I grew up in a family with powerful and bright women. Told do what you can, do better, do more! I was
never told to sit in my box and behave in the dot of the planet that society has created for me, having a
silent life of a girl.
I read, explored, and studied. I experimented and learned. I could not and would not believe what the
the world expected for the life of a girl!
I skipped a grade, I studied hard, I excelled, I danced, I sang, I painted, and I took extra classes and training. I
stayed and played outside no matter what the weather. I imagined a world much different from what
they said my life as a girl should be.
Math and science I love. Spelling and reading books blew everyone away. Knowledge and travel made
my heart soar. Then I was told to remember my life as a girl.
Early to engineering school with a scholarship, I went. Biochemistry I studied. Even got all my
requirements done by October of my senior year. But guess what?? That whole thing was to prove to
myself my worth and ability after getting raped my freshman year. Nothing can erase that, but I
mentioned it you too can conquer anything and not let your past dictate your future. Any obstacles
that the men who control it throw at you. Because the life of a girl is tougher than any boy will
understand. Show them what you can do!
I did it. I made a big mistake by getting married. Left my Nuclear Med and immunology research path to
marry my college sweetheart. If I only knew then that meant throwing my future down the drain. The world
was happy that one more smart woman was put in her place! Getting married I didn’t realize
I could never resurrect my science career, no matter how I tried. The life of a girl involves many sacrifices
for the happiness of men.

My family was devastated! That I would give up a promising career. They knew what a mistake it was.
Every time I enjoyed success after marriage like the art and framing studio, environmental work. He
would find a way to derail my success. The life of a girl is challenged by the thought that men are better.
I taught school, I operated a successful business, and I learned to think in another language. My family back
home in the USA was dealing with cancer. Of course, the questions came up: when do you want to close
the business to make babies? I earned as much as he did. Do I want them to make my decisions for me
for the next twenty years ???? Do you want to go back to America to be with your dying mom? Maybe we
should divorce. The life of a girl is full of impossible choices.
I walked away with just the shirt on my back. My faith and my sanity. The life of a girl may put you in
precarious places.

In order to survive, I bought the idea that I was a woman here to serve men only as a maid or lover. In the
Eastern thought process women can be teachers, nurses mothers, or escorts. The view was so
entrenched in the culture I began to believe it!! The life of a girl means doing what is necessary to
survive.
I came back to the USA, actually, I tried twice. Both times were more traumatic than the first here and in
Greece. One might never know what stories fill the life of a girl.
I worked in restaurants and sales. No one wanted to believe I was capable of more. Why?? I didn’t have a
man to support me. Be quiet please just do what is expected in the life of a girl.
I understood and remarried. Someone who seemed to share the same values. But I was wrong.

I
learned a big lesson because I live my life as a girl.
Traffic court, domestic violence court, and immigration court. I was deeply punished for loving the
wrong person. Ever see a deep sadness in a girl’s eyes? You can read it all there. The inequalities never
end in the life of a girl.
I made it out alive! Three jobs sometimes. This is because I have not had the space or a supportive partner
to wait it out for the” right job”. I pay my bills. The life of a girl isn’t easy.

Society still treats women who work and have a significant other better than the ones roughing it out
alone. The life of a girl isn’t always fair.
We thought progress was possible. Post pandemic on many levels men is trying to keep the women at
home serving them. It’s been a long time feeling unheard in the life of a girl.